STFU W/ LOL

With the advent of the Internet came the introduction of the term “LOL.” I’m sure it served a useful purpose when it was first used, presumably by Al Gore after receiving a good anal rape joke in the only email ever to have just one “fwd” in the subject (since he’s apparently responsible for everything related to the world wide web). But it didn’t take long for amateurs to abuse the acronym to the point of being annoying. First they used the term as a response to moderately amusing statements:

“Poker? I didn’t even know her!”
“LOL!”

The letters stand for “laugh out loud.” If a comment barely made you snicker, find another term. But loosely throwing around LOL only encourages mediocre humor.

Next came the LOL in response to one’s own statement:

“Poker? I didn’t even know her! LOL!”

Just as in conversation, laughing the loudest at your own joke doesn’t make it any funnier- it just makes you look lame. Good rule of thumb: if you have to tell people it’s funny, it probably isn’t.

Finally, LOL started being used in lieu of an actual apology:

“Oops. I screwed up. LOL!”

I’ve already accepted the fact that most people can’t utter the phrase “I’m sorry.” I don’t know why this is so difficult to say since it really makes life much easier when you can. But LOL is definitely not interchangeable for “I’m sorry.” In fact, it sounds like the person’s mocking the situation rather than apologizing for it. And that’s just irritating. Then when you call them on whether or not they think their screw up is funny, they inevitably say, “No, I swear. LOL.” And that’s when I want to use my bionics to fry their mother board (but, like most of the other Heroes, I’ve yet to learn how to control this ability of mine).

If you’re one of the millions addicted to “LOL,” it’s not too late to weed yourself off it. Start by limiting yourself to just one LOL per post or email (for some people, I know this will be a challenge and they’ll simply substitute LOL with a bunch of emoticons, which are equally overused). Only write it when you actually laughed out loud. I know, silly concept. Or try breaking away from it all together with other terms: “heh heh” for a chuckle, “hee hee” for a giggle, “ha ha!” for a guffaw or better yet, come up with something original. Let the term “LOL” return to a place where it actually has significance because frankly, I’m getting headaches from trying to figure out what new terms like “ROFLMAOWMSOMN!” mean.