Aug
30

Survivor: Faith Island

Posted in Blog, Television
There's a bit of a brouhaha right now over the fact that the next edition of Survivor will feature four tribes of people divided by their ethnicities. I sort of liked the idea at first until I saw a picture of the contestants and discovered that even when Surivor ups the number of minorities, they still can't provide their faithful viewers with a hot Latino man. Seriously- how hard is it to find a sexy Hispanic man who can leave his job for 39 days? After 12 seasons, they owe us. They did however select a white dude I'm almost positive used to star in a sitcom and has appeared on a lot of shows. It used to be that ...
Aug
25

Keeping Abreast Of My Surroundings

Posted in Blog, Daily Life
Today while waiting for an elevator at a shopping center, I observed quite a spectacle: It was a 40ish woman wearing a black micro-mini dress (at 4:00 in the afternoon). She actually had nice legs I'm sure were fresh from the liposuction office so the tiny dress wasn't the issue. It was that she probably had the biggest, hardest, fake breasts I've ever seen. In LA, fake breasts are everywhere but it looked like she had two big bullhorns in her top so they really caught your attention. I tried to take a picture but I couldn't get her at the right angle so it wouldn't be totally obvious and I didn't think it would fly if I asked, "Mind ...
Aug
18

Dream Overanalysis

I always begin my sleep with a nice little fantasy. I mention this because I learned a couple years ago that not everybody does so. Some people put their head on the pillow and think about their day or what they have to do the next day. That seems like a lousy way to spend your downtime. I don't know if there's a correlation, but from the people I've discussed this with, the ones who start with a fantasy seem to be better sleepers. It's something for you restless worrywarts to consider. So I have a catalog of fantasies that I rotate. The usual stuff: career goals, wild adventures and of course romance are a few. For a long time ...
Aug
16

Signs Signs Everywhere Signs

Posted in Blog, Daily Life
I saw this road sign in San Diego this weekend and I wondered what its purpose is. Is it to save a text-happy, unattentive youngster from the same fate as Miss Deaf America? Or is to let people know the kid's not making gang signs with his hands so don't shoot him? Let's face it, a kid in the road is a problem whether they can hear or not. All the sign does is let me know that if the first honk doesn't work, I shouldn't bother putting any more wear on my horn. The sign is only slightly less ridiculous than one I saw in Massachusettes a few years ago that said "Beware of ...
Aug
10

Going Dutch (Nazi Style)

Posted in Blog, Relationships
I've had my share of bad dating experiences but this guy is in a class all his own: Darren Sherman He's so insane it's funny.
Aug
05

Troubled Youth Apply Here

Posted in Blog, In The News
So two teenagers burglarize a home and steal a laptop containing sensitive government data. Another person- presumably an associate of the thieves- turns in the laptop to collect a $50,000 reward. It made me think: If anybody knows some young hooligans looking to take someone into their confidence, please have them contact Aunt Nene. Discretion is assured (unless another c-note is waved in my face). [tags]stolen laptop, teenagers, military personnel[/tags]
Aug
03

We Have The Same Birthday! Oh Wait…

Posted in Blog, In The News
I got a big kick out of this one: A bar waitress checking to see if a woman was legally old enough to drink was handed her own stolen driver's license, which was reported missing weeks earlier, police said. (Full story) I'm almost surprised she looked at it carefully enough to notice it was hers. Back when I had a fake I.D., I used it show it while I was with the person whose old license it was. Nobody ever noticed. [tags]fake id, stolen drivers license[/tags]
Aug
02

The Passion Of The Israelis

Now they're bombing the crap out of Lebanon resulting in the deaths of almost 600 Lebanese and 55 Israelis. Isn't anybody over there doing the math?

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